August is here & am on the countdown….

As the pain of this condition overwhelms my life, my honesty leads me to divulge the TRUE extent of it all! I am medicated to the nines! Taking a range of meds that are supposed to dull the pain& suppress the muscles! They do help but the pain is intense! I mean i am practically housebound at present & find menial tasks almost impossible. Now, i really am trying to keep myself mobile but its HARD. School hols are upon us & the want to indulge in day trips especially with my youngest son is massive….the reality is…its not happening. The guilt & inadequacy felt is profound! Fortunately he is bless him, a home boy of sorts so enjoys simply being ‘home’…. There are days when i can bearly move out of bed. This is becoming more than just a condition & more of a life changing phase! I do have treatment coming up in the next few weeks, i can hardly wait!!!

I find myself so dependant on my immediate family & to be honest it takes its toll on your pride. I really do try remain positive but that’s difficult at times!!!


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